When I was younger, I could talk on the phone for hours. I mean hours. I’d stay up all night on a call, whispering so I wouldn’t wake anyone else in the house, completely losing track of time. Talking on the phone wasn’t stressful — it was how we connected.
Fast forward to now, and the sound of my phone ringing sends my anxiety straight into overdrive. Not a notification. Not a text alert. The actual ringing. There are days I want to throw the phone across the room just to make it stop.
The list of people I’ll actually answer for is short: my husband and my youngest two kids. That’s it. Everyone else can text. I mean, if my other kids or my parents called me, I would answer, but they are strictly texters.
And it turns out, we’re far from alone.
We Used to Live on the Phone
For a long time, phone calls were the main way to communicate. If you wanted to talk to someone, you called them. There was no option to ease into a conversation or decide later if you had the energy for it.
Because of that, phone calls felt normal. Comfortable. They didn’t require mental preparation. You answered, talked, and eventually said goodbye.
Somewhere along the way, that changed.
Texting Gave Us Control — and We Refuse to Give It Back
Texting didn’t just change communication; it changed expectations. Now we can respond when we’re ready, think through what we want to say, or not respond at all without it being a full social offense.
For someone already juggling work, family, and constant mental noise, that control matters. A phone call removes it instantly.
When the phone rings, it demands your full attention whether you’re in the middle of something or barely holding it together.
Phone Calls Feel Like Intrusions, Not Connections
A ringing phone feels aggressive now. It cuts through everything and demands to be handled immediately. There’s no context, no warning, no chance to prepare.
It’s not that we don’t want to talk — we just don’t want to be ambushed.
Texting lets us decide when and how we engage. Phone calls decide for us.
Call Anxiety Isn’t Dramatic — It’s Practical
Phone anxiety doesn’t mean you’re antisocial. It means you understand how draining unexpected emotional labor can be.
When the phone rings, you don’t know:
- How long the conversation will last
- What kind of mood you need to be in
- Whether someone needs something from you
- If it’s going to turn into a problem you now have to solve
That uncertainty alone is exhausting.
Even Kids Avoid Phone Calls
What really drives the point home is that even kids avoid phone calls. As I mentioned before, my older ones won’t call at all. Texting is their default, just like it’s become mine.
For them, phone calls feel awkward and unnecessary. For us, they feel stressful and intrusive. Different reasons, same result.
Phone Calls Demand Emotional Availability We Don’t Always Have
A phone call requires immediate emotional presence. You can’t pause, re-read, or step away without it being noticeable.
Texting lets us stay connected without fully opening ourselves up. It’s communication with boundaries — and in today’s world, boundaries are survival tools.
We Didn’t Become Rude — We Became Overstimulated
We didn’t suddenly decide to hate phone calls. Life just got louder, faster, and more demanding.
Ignoring a call isn’t about disrespect. It’s about protecting peace.
And let’s be honest — most of the time, it really could’ve been a text.
Lisa Crow contributed to this article. She is a true crime junkie and lifestyle blogger based in Waco, Texas. Lisa is the Head of Content at Gigi’s Ramblings and Southern Bred True Crime Junkie. She spends her free time traveling when she can and making memories with her large family which consists of six children and fifteen grandchildren.